For you, Kim.
Sifting through the layers of dark tormenting rubble that covers me. My body mangled into something I cannot see. There are no cracks of light, pure black. I soak in the darkness, drenched into my very pours, as the weight crushes my lungs and I gasp for air.
Where is this source that illuminates the healing within? I know it exists somewhere out there, but I can’t seem to reach for it. The shrapnel pierces my skin and tears at my flesh leaving me paralyzed.
I am trapped beneath the suffocating wreckage of what is now my existence.
Held captive of these stones so cold, so hard, so unforgiving-barricading me into parameters of treacherous depths created in this nightmare I am living.
Where is this Loving God my sister spoke of? How can I know it to be true?
In the depths of my despair I linger, long for, lost. Silently wondering what for…
Rocks shift ever so slightly, sparks flicker beyond where I lay. I begin to twist and turn toward it in fresh welled tears of yearning. I pull and push and kick to reach that light, still strangled and struggling to breath.
Is this the air I have longed for?
I beg and plead and scream for it to come to me, gasping for breath. This tiny illumination engulfs my sheath of weighted darkness as I quiver and shake and tremble at Its Power.
His Holiness knows no bounds, no barricades, no barriers to Light.
I explode with unforeseen might that ignites the shrouds of ruins that fall scattered around me. I pull my weakened broken body to new heights from where I lift my head to discover…
Vivid colors come alive, rich with the sweetness I can taste, smell, feel.
Is this what Mercy looks like? Is this redemption?
I bask in its glory. It’s hope.
For the Lord my God has shown Himself to me…
And taken me out of the debris.
To once again
It’s a soul shattered story.
A tormenting nightmare, if there ever was one.
And it captivates me so deeply, I too can barely breath just envisioning her rubble.
She has found light.
Through the cracks and crevices of shifting rocks.
And I rejoice in her hope.
For any other precious soul that has been buried beneath the rubble of darkness…
There will be light.
Stones will move ever so slightly to allow it to illuminate your existence. God will make sure of that.
Keep looking for it. Hoping for it. Stretching for it. Praying for it.
It will come.
As it did My precious friend, Kim.
May this bring hope for the hopeless…