My next February Friend is Michell, from Prowess and Pearls!! She always has convicting and inspiring messages over at her place! Her heart is beautiful and God’s Love truly shines, when she shares her words of encouragement with her readers.
Friends…how many of us have them?
I have certain standards, as should you, I look for in a friend (no, not that I’m better than the next person) – I just REALLY ENJOY living in a “drama free” zone, which is working quite WELL for me! Some of these descriptions may sound funny, but sadly, they are so true and I see them in the lives of so many people around me.
As a friend you must make sure you’re NOT “The Cling On” – you know, the needy friend – the person who acts as if they can’t possibly live without others. People don’t realize this is a quality that must NOT be overlooked! If you’re a needy friend, then all you’ll do is suck your relationships dry. Your friend(s) will always be giving and you’ll always be taking. I don’t care what anyone says…they may be nice to your face; but I guarantee, behind your back; they won’t like you very much and will only look at you as a problem! I mean really, we as women are surrounded by people who are dependent on us on a daily basis (and rightfully so)…the last thing we need is a friend who is always taking and NEVER giving.
Don’t get me wrong, there will be times when one friend has to be the shoulder to cry on or the springboard, all at one time. What I’m referencing to here is that person who NEVER seems to be around for the other person when the tables are turned.
Another friendship zapper – that’s to the OTHER extreme – is “The Know-It-All”. This is the overbearing friend…one of MY major pet peeves. To make it clear, these friends can be great helpers. They may be there whenever you need them however; they can sometimes use it as a way to intricately weave themselves into the lives of others. I perceive they aren’t getting the attention they need from the loved ones in their lives and their validation comes from overcompensating in the area of friendships. Next thing you know, they’re giving their opinions (all the time might I add) and unwanted advice; and if those opinions or advice are not eagerly received they get very offended – making sure they let YOU know, they feel under appreciated.
Last, but most certainly not least; please oh please make sure you’re NOT ’The Pig”…this is the person who “hogs” their friendships; no one else can be within a five foot radius of their friend, if so, you’ll see them wear “green envy” like a badge of honor. No one else can talk to their friend without them spiraling into the “abyss” of paranoia. It can sometimes borderline “possessiveness” and can make a great storyline for a “Lifetime” movie. Sounds crazy right – because it is!
Ladies, please take a look at your friendships, and if it seems as if they’re not the way they used to be – examine yourself and make sure as a friend you’re not giving off any of these attributes and if you are…I admonish you to make a change. No, I’m not criticizing you, I just want you to experience healthy, long-lived friendships, the ones that we all deserve. It’s so much easier to have healthy friendships when our relationship with God is solid. I’m a firm believer that if you have an unhealthy relationship with yourself, more than likely your relationships with others will suffer in the process. God’s girls are way above the drama of this day and age. We know that good friends are to be cherished, not taken advantage of or misused. As a friend, you should be just that; a friend – someone who’s a confidant, who supports, encourages, is loyal and loving; and does unto them as you would have them do unto you. Ruth 1:16-17. ICYB! )
Michell Pulliam is mom to three beautiful children and one handsome son-in-law and wife to Pastor Todd Pulliam. She and her husband shepherd a flock of God’s children in Columbia, South Carolina at Word Empowerment Zone Ministries! She blogs for and about women. Her passion is teaching and training women to biblically love themselves, so they can accurately show others the love of Christ! Her to the point post will humor you, challenge you, but most of all encourage you. Michell’s motto in life she lives by and which she challenges everyone to do, is…to “DO YOU well!
All Rights Reserved copyright© 2012 Michell Pulliam “Prowess and Pearls” Devotionals by Michell Pulliam