I Want To Be Mary…

I keep thinking about Mary and Martha, you know those women of the bible, who resemble any of us out there?  They are two of Jesus’ closest friends.  Their brother was Lazarus.   This isn’t about his story though- maybe another time, because it is a pretty good one.  The story I keep being reminded of is the one about these sisters, when Jesus came for supper.  It’s probably in my mind because the Holidays are inching their way in faster this year than the last.  Maybe it’s God’s way of reminding me to slow down and focus on the “better part”.  How do you handle the Holiday Season?  I am already starting to go into “hyper mode” of making lists and buying gifts and planning meals…

Before we are completely bombarded with the checklists and errands and busyness of this time, may I remind you of Martha?

It kind of goes something like this:  Martha is busy and stressed out. “How am I supposed to do it ALL!  Boy, wouldn’t it be nice to get some help around here?”  And Mary has sat down at His feet to chill with Him. “Oh Jesus, you are so awesome!  I love hanging with you and listening to all your cool stories…it just gives me so much peace.”  (Insert ‘angelic smile’ here)

 Remember those women?  Martha was scurrying in the kitchen and frustrated that Mary wasn’t helping.  She complained to Jesus (can you imagine?) that her sister wasn’t helping, and Jesus told Martha that Mary was choosing the right thing to do.  Mary was with Him.  I actually love the story, because it resonates so intimately with all of us…doesn’t it?

I am the first to confess that I have never, ever made a turkey in my life of 46 years.  I confessed this little scam last year.  I am ashamed and sorry for all you women who hate me now, (yes, all you Marthas…I know you are out there!) but it is what it is.  I have a sister who started a beautiful tradition of doing all the work every darn year.  How can I take that blessing away from her?  Or any family or friends I have shared a Holiday meal such as this?   It’s just who I am.  It’s my way of giving.  Yes, that is sarcasm. 

 I tend to watch my lovely cooks juggle things I could never imagine.  I eat all the appetizers and “ooh and aaah” over their dishes cooking and keep them company.  I often throw out that polite, “Can I help?”  And then I meander around the kitchen looking for something worthy of my irresponsible hands.  I become lost and confused, so I resign to going back to my post of eating and watching, wandering around visiting and enjoying the aroma of the home…


When I host a gathering, I scurry around and serve and cook and clear plates and do dishes and serve some more and and and…  sometimes  truly missing out on the great conversation that is taking place while I busy myself in the kitchen.  I always consume myself with all the details of the “serving” and hardly ever sit to enjoy the moments with my friends or family.  Yes, things need to be done in order to provide a lovely meal.  So how would I go about doing both?


 I want to embrace the relationships and not the busyness.

But most of all…

 I want to embrace His Holiness and not the craziness.  As things start to get at a hyper pace around here, may I be reminded of Mary, and sit at His feet and spend time with my Lord.

 Thank you for the reminder God.  I will do my best…

At The Home of Martha and Mary

 Now as they went on their way, he entered a certain village, where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. She had a sister named Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to   what he was saying. But Martha was distracted by her many tasks; so she came to him and asked, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to do all the work by myself? Tell her then to help me.” But the Lord   answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted by many things; there is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her” (Luke 10:38-42).

I Want To Be Mary Let us all try hard this Holiday Seasonand choose the better part.






The Mommy Mess

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  1. says

    Like you, I want to be Mary. I often find myself identifying with Martha: scurrying around, worrying about things and sometimes losing precious opportunities to sit in His presence and learn of Him. Thanks for this great reminder. God Bless You.

    • says

      YES! It’s just our nature isn’t it? The worrying for sure. My mind is so distracted, I can’t get one clear prayer in! And I get so wound up in the “getting things done” that I put God second, no third, no after I organize, no after I do one more errand, oh wait…maybe after I clean the sheets for houseguests…grocery…santa shop…lists..cards…decor…and on and on and on. Thanks so much for reading, Hope. God bless YOU!

  2. says

    I am naturally a Martha, but I SO want to be Mary. I HAVE learned that when I’m hosting, I don’t try to do everything: I ask someone to bring a salad or a side and that makes it so much easier that I’m actually able to sit and enjoy with my guests.

    Now if I could just find someone to secretly come in and wash the dishes in the sink while we’re having coffee…

    • says

      Good job on the hosting Michelle! Oh yes, those dishes do sit and crust over during coffee don’t they? You see, that’s why I am DOING them while everyone else is enjoying their dessert and beverages! Actually, I give credit to my dear hubby because he always helps. 🙂 Here’s to choosing the better part in the weeks to come!

  3. Marcia says

    Ok, I didn’t respond earlier because I was doing “my Martha”. Isn’t it great that we know have a word to describe our chaotic, busyness? Thanks for that 😉 Seriously though when I sat down to read this post it hit me “bam” right between the eyes. I know God is “all knowing and all seeing” but isn’t it amazing (’cause I know that I’m not the only one) when He tatoos the message right on your forehead. I think sometimes just to show off;) Great blog as we get into the craziness that is the holiday. Let us all strive to be more like Mary!

  4. LeeAnn says

    I wouldn’t want another year to go by without you having the privilege of cooking a turkey…feel free to stop by and cook ours! Martha shows up every year, but Mary graces our presence everyone once in a while (even if for just a moment). Thank God for glimpses of her.

    • says

      Oh dear friend, you are too TOO kind to offer that beautiful blessing! Um, I am really busy with family coming in town and all…maybe NEXT year. 😉 lol
      The better part truly is…the better part. I want more of that! Less of Martha…

  5. says

    I also have never cooked a turkey! I’m not a cook. Period. I leave that up to my husband and/or my mom on Thanksgiving.

    I will be channeling Mary. We’ve vowed to concentrate on family (and some football!) this year. No Black Friday for us.

    We all need to take deep breaths this time of year and just enjoy time with each other. Thanks for the reminder!

    • says

      YAY! Another turkeyless friend!! Very cool that your hubby would do it! Good for you to focus on Family time (and football) this year… deep breaths, yes! I love “channeling Mary”, just love that! My new mantra, if you don’t mind me borrowing that! It’s simply perfect. 🙂

  6. Carol Denney says

    Ah… my dear sister, Mary. Funny reading this since I am your Martha behind the scenes enabling you to stay that sweet Mary!! Cool thing is – I can also be Mary – and stop and smell the roses – listen to Jesus… And you can help me scurry around the kitchen preparing for the twenty people about to sit at the grand table. You remind me to settle, I remind you to help serve – and together, we Marys and Marthas inspire and remind each other to work together as women…praise God, listen to each other, and together – the holidays are glorious because we see the strengths and weaknesses in each other – and bring the best out in each other. Love you sister – I’ll be glad to make that turkey for you as long as I can – as long as you promise to sit and talk to me, love me, and we can praise God together and always remember our relationships with each other and Jesus are what’s most important!!!

    • says

      Ahhh…yes dear sister!! I was hoping you would read this one! HA! I love eating and watching you scurry around the kitchen and somehow manage to feed the thousands with amazing mouth watering food! You do your magic and ahem…I’ll do mine! What is mine again? Eating and watching? Yeah. That’s it. LOL But glad you see it as a balance of us and see the blessing in it all! 🙂

    • says

      Well I think you are probably more likely to spend quiet time with Jesus than me…who can’t keep her mouth shut at any cost! Maybe you are naturally a Mary. I love friends like you. You tend to balance me out!

  7. says

    Okay, I’m going to try(for the 4th time)to leave this comment lady. Your blog must not like me, lol! Thanks for always writing timely post my friend! Couldn’t agree more, we should embrace His holiness and let go of our craziness! I wrote a post about Mary and Martha back in August entitled, “Stop sweatin’ the small stuff”. Don’t you just love how the Holy Spirit works?! Thanks for the reminder Chris, have a blessed day! ;-))

    • says

      OH NO!!! God BLESS you Michell for trying FOUR times to comment! I am so sorry…I would have just plain given up. You are a dear to keep trying! Thanks so much for your support!!! Yes, I will have to read that article! Send me the link…:)

    • says

      Oh yes, dear friend! He soooo loves your company!!! I know you do find time to sit with Him…but perhaps He’s calling you to sit more, listen more, and nourish yourself with His calming and comforting love and guidance.

  8. Sue Theimer says

    No more turkeys for me! My Martha days are over and I thank the Lord for that. Now I value the friends that give of their time and energies and generously include me at their tables. God makes time for Mary AND Martha.

    • says

      It’s what I believe to be true… all that we give comes back. You are now in the season of “receiving”. But I know you give in other ways to all, I’m sure of that! And yes…thank God that He is with each and every one of us Marys and Marthas! He meets us RIGHT where we are… 🙂

  9. says

    This is awesome. And judging by what I’ve read from you, I know you have Martha in you. You have that ability to be in the right place, at the right time. To embrace this season not only for what it means, but for the gifts (our kids) we get to enjoy 365 days a year.

    • says

      Thank you Eli. You are a dear thoughtful and generous soul!! I thought of you when writing this and wanted to add a guy version for YOU! lol You can easily adapt to anything as you have proven youself over and over here… Here’s to our kids and all that is Divine during this season!! 🙂

  10. says

    Haha! Too funny, I’m baaack! Dropping by from SITS…you just happen to be the person right before me, lol! Hope you and your family had an awesome Thanksgiving!

    • says

      OH that is HILARIOUS!!! Thanks for doing a double take! Hope your Holiday was LOVELY my dear! Ours was great and chaotic and exhausting and blessed. LOL

  11. says

    I am more a Martha. I just wish there could have been a trade off. Jesus, Mary, and Martha in the kitchen working and talking. I understand the lesson but women in our country are taught to produce. Look at all the crafts we do. Thanks for the post. Visiting from Sharefest.

    • says

      Yes, oh yes…trade off is a splendid idea!!! Maybe they could all hang in the kitchen together and share the “better part” together WHILE doing all the work! Actually, if I was Martha…I would simply go ask Jesus to produce a miracle meal so I could sit with Mary and take it all in too… 🙂 Thanks sooo much for visiting!!!

  12. says

    {Melinda} Honestly, I have struggled with this and felt some very painful effects from focusing more on the “busy” than on the relationships. I’m still busy, but I do rely on the Holy Spirit to pull me back in line when things get out of balance. He never lets me down! 🙂

    • says

      Oh yes, I think most women struggle with this and at times truly suffer the consequences when the balance is off. SO glad you listen to and obey the Holy Spirit’s nudging and keep your discernment clear! As I get older, I get better at this, but there are still times I find myself flying off the edge and it is never good from there! Thanks for reading and sharing Melinda!!!

    • says

      It’s one of mine too! I think because I can so relate to every part of it. I love when scripture just pierces your heart and soul with incredible wisdom and light, don’t you? It sticks around and if you let it, His Word saturates your every day. Oh it’s just so powerful!! 🙂

    • says

      I think there are quite a few Marthas out there! You and me both girl! Lets try harder to choose the better part, okay? Oh how we both know the pay off would be totally worth it!! Here’s to *Breathing*, *Praying*, and staying in His Presence, and in THE moment. It’s a far reach…

      But we can DO IT! XOXO

      (Hoping you are feeling okay? SO excited for YOU!!)

  13. says

    hahaha we now know your secret!! I’m striving to be more “Mary” this year — it’s so darn hard to be though 😉 Beautifully written my friend!!

    • says

      YOU AND ME BOTH GIRL!!!! I did great that day I posted this- it was AWESOME!! I was ssoooooo “in it” with my kids decorating the tree and actually singing Christmas carols and laughing etc! Then Monday came….

      Starting over again and again…

  14. says

    I want very much to be a Mary this year. Spending lots of focused time (extra time!) with Jesus, and not getting caught up in the busyness of the month.

    I am totally a Mary when it comes to cooking…..mostly because I have no Martha-worthy cooking skills.

    • says

      HA! YAY! I found another Mary in the kitchen!! LOL 😉

      Okay- I love that you will be spending lots of extra time with Jesus… I need to do this TOO. Thank you for this reminder and conviction to make purposeful decisions EVERY DAY to spend time with the ONE who deserves my time most. God bless YOU Tracie!!

    • says

      HAHAHAHA!!!! I LOVE LOVE LOVE this comment!!! Hilarious!! And Lord KNOWS I can say the same!!!! Oh Manal, you are cracking me UP!! Okay- lets try to set a goal that we will only be Martha for 1/4 of the month… is that to much of a stretch? We can DO THIS!!! *sweating profusely* lol

  15. Candice Harper says

    Just a few days ago, we were reading about them in Sunday school class and someone kept repeating….” I soooo just want to be more like Mary” ! Amen!

    • says

      Oh how I do too!! I hope you can share this piece with them!! That would be so cool! Many women… oh so many need this reminder and encouragement! Lots of Marthas out there!!! 😉

  16. says

    This is such a great reminder! I will never forget the day my son asked me if I’ve ever heard of Mary and Martha in the Bible, as he so politely let me know I was a Martha.

    • says

      Okay- that is the most hilarious and yet profound story EVER!! Don’t ya just love it when God speaks to us through our kids? Happens. All. The. Time. Lets both choose the better part this season… okay?? 🙂

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